“Life is a series of commas, not periods.” That’s a quote from one of the deepest thinkers in the game right now, Mr. Matthew McConaughey. He’s right.
I was feasting at Taco Bell because my body is a temple. I’m drizzling taco sauce on my eighth El Fresco taco. El Fresco makes the taco “healthier” by using a fresh salsa instead of cheese.
The miniature white capsule lays on the terminal carpeting and screams to be swallowed. So you pick it up and swallow it instead of telling the owner it dropped out of his pants pocket. It might be prescription heart medication. It could be a narcotic.
Rosemarie almost died taking a photo of a fucking penguin.
I want to make it incredibly clear that this date was awesome. Absolutely fantastic and a top five all time on my list of third dates. Our first date failed to crack my top five first dates but our second date stands firmly at number two of best second dates.
I wanted to think I was ready to handle a teen boy, but I didn’t realize the rocky road I was in for. Caring for a teen is hard, especially while trying coordinate his return in exchange for a large sum of money from his uncooperative father.
I can’t draw with my daughter without being beg to doodle a Disney princess.
These are the coffee mugs we all own.
The bathtub leaked down into the kitchen ceiling and it all had to be ripped down.
The cat is for real trying to murder me.